Over the past 18 months I have posted observations about cats in general and my Casey in particular.  Now, we are well into our third year of living together and I’d like to talk about what I have learned from her…what she has taught me.

First, cats can’t lie.  They want what they want and if we listen closely, they’ll tell us clearly what their needs are.  At a basic level, they need safety, food, water, and a dry place to live.  This is an instinctive level of need that is true for all of us.  But they also learn.  Who is a friend and who is an enemy.  How to hunt.  How to stay sheltered.  What cold, hot, dry, snowy, balmy, means.  Casey has learned these things and I trust her judgement.  She will still go out in bad weather but it’s her choice and she picks her times.  It took some time for me to accept her standing desire to be an outdoor/indoor cat.  During the day, she roams.  At night she comes in.  She figured out that cars make noise that she avoids.  She also knows that streets have cars and she avoids them like the plague.  Rather she stays in back where she has acres of free, safe space.  So be it.  It’s her choice.

One thing that was not negotiable was loving her.  When we first met, she was a scared castaway.  Hungry, tired, thirsty, she wanted the basics.  She got them.  She also got constant loving.  Every meeting was joyful full of petting and happy voices.  100%.  Never an exception.  No loud voices, no “no’s,” just love.  Now she has learned to want this attention.  She curls up to me at night where we spend an hour just cuddling.  When I fall asleep, she goes off to her blanket for a good night’s snooze.

From these truths, I now see what is needed for our human babies.  Like cats, they can’t lie.  They want what they want.  It’s our job as parents to provide it without taxation.  Like Casey, they need to learn about the world on their terms.  They also need 100% love.  My kids have done very well in their lives but from Casey, I have learned what could have been done.  This is a story that’s too late for me, but other parents out there, learn from your cats.  They’re very wise.